Each of us at least once in our lives has dealt with the friend zone. In this article, we will try to understand what the “friendship zone” is, and how to get out of it.

You can't stay and get out: how to get out of the friend zone

What is the friend zone in a relationship

Not every communication between a young man and a girl belongs to the “friend zone” category. There is an option when they are just friends who appreciate each other, or are not looking for anything more. In such a relationship, their friendship does not harm anyone.

But sometimes one of the friends may begin to feel sympathy for the other . After that, he may want to change his status to a closer one, then the friendship automatically goes into the friend zone.

To put it another way, The friend zone is when one of the friends is clearly aware that he has unrequited feelings. And the second at this moment does not want to change the usual format of communication. This friend feels comfortable within friendships.

It doesn't matter if someone expressed their feelings or remained silent, this is already 100% friend zone. Therefore, before you understand that you are in the friend zone, you need to be aware of your feelings.

What's wrong with the "red" zone

The friend zone is a place that can harm a person. It comes down to suffering, a decrease in self-esteem and a sense of worth. People who find themselves in the friend zone are often aware of their absurdity, the futility of their hopes, but they try to hide it from themselves using a defense mechanism.

The longer a person stays in the friend zone, the less attractive they become. After all, self-assessment largely depends on how people see us, whom we appreciate and love. If the beloved does not want to let us get close, then we begin to believe that our virtues do not matter. This can lead to feelings of pity or guilt.

Existence in the friend zone leads to the fact that guys lose their masculinity, and girls lose their femininity. They become too self-critical, sensitive. If before that they enjoyed the attention of the opposite sex, now, in the friend zone, they found themselves in a situation where this attention is absent.

To get rid of the undesirable consequences associated with the friend zone, you need to increase your self-esteem . To do this, you need to leave this zone, start enjoying life without thinking about what others think about it. Sometimes you even have to close the gestalt after the friend zone with a psychologist.

How to get out of the friend zone for a girl and a guy

Getting out of the friend zone is not an easy task. The fact is that a long stay in this place negatively affects your attractiveness in the eyes of the desired person. In order not to get into such an unpleasant situation, it is better to avoid the friendship zone completely. But if nevertheless you have already got into it, do not rush to despair!

There are universal steps that will help you get out of this zone and increase your chances of a romantic relationship. You will certainly be able to regain your self-confidence in order to demonstrate your best qualities in front of the desired person.

1. Stop fooling yourself

Many people don't know how to get out of the friend zone just because of their bad reflections. They express their feelings, but are politely rebuffed for offering to remain friends. As a result, they may think that even they themselves did not particularly desire this relationship.

Sometimes they begin to look for flaws in their partner, look down on her, trying to compensate for their failure. However, it is important to see the situation objectively, not to build illusions. It is important to recognize that you are at a disadvantage and look for ways to change the situation.

2. Assess the possible risks

If you have not yet had time to show your love, you should carefully weigh your thoughts and actions. After all, in case of refusal, it is impossible to maintain ordinary relations. There is a risk that the connection between you will be interrupted altogether.

If you value your friendship and shared experiences, it may be worth keeping the current state of affairs. It is better to abandon the idea of ​​​​intimacy, to look for your destiny further.

3. Make sure it's compatible

Before you take risks and take your relationship to the next level, you need to honestly assess your chances. It is important to analyze how you fit together, whether a powerful social gap is preventing you.

The ability to objectively assess your capabilities will help to avoid many problems. In addition, you will not waste time and emotions on a matter that is a foregone conclusion anyway, you will not remain hopelessly in love with another person for a long time, being in the “friend zone”.

Don't make the mistake of thinking that the other person knows nothing about your impulses and desires. Alas, humans are masters at recognizing non-verbal cues. Probably, your interlocutor has already noticed your hidden emotions and deliberately keeps you in the “friend zone”.

4. Don't be too active

Optimize your communication time and do not overload the person with endless calls and messages all day long. This can give the impression that you are always dependent on him.

Let the person feel your absence and miss you. Show more initiative in communication so that he wants to continue the established connection. In this way, he will be able to appreciate you more fully and see you as an interesting person.

5. Watch the quality

You need to seriously work on improving the quality of your communication. Make it interesting, memorable and emotional. Try to make your time spent together special and unforgettable.

Don't let routine and boring conversations get the better of you.Tell fascinating stories, offer to visit unusual places where you can get new experiences. Then your partner will want to meet more often and spend more time with you.

6. Get interesting

Getting into the friend zone is a good reason to work on yourself. Go through all the circles of improvement to become the best version of yourself and like yourself. Try on new hobbies. Expand your horizons and become an interesting conversationalist so that your company becomes a pleasant pastime. You can not talk about this to a person in love, let him notice the change and be surprised.

7. Upgrade your appearance

If the person is open and friendly but shows no desire to deepen the relationship, your appearance may be lacking. You can fix this situation by paying attention to how you look.

Sometimes it is enough to make small changes to get a quick and noticeable result. A change in hairstyle , an updated wardrobe, improved posture - all this can significantly affect your image and attractiveness.

8. Stay independent

It is important to show the person that you are not dependent on him. Of course, you may like him, but you are not going to spend your life in the role of "eternal waiter." Chat with the opposite sex, make new friends and live life to the fullest.

Do not be afraid that you will lose the chance of a relationship with the person you like. If you sit in the role of a submissive and faithful "dog", then your chances will decrease even more.

When you enter into a relationship with someone, it is possible that your friend will change his attitude towards you. Competition forces people to take a fresh look at what yesterday seemed indifferent and unimportant to them.

If there is no way out

If you applied all the tips, but nothing happened, you should not beat your head against the wall. It should be realized that you may simply not be suitable for this person, and it makes no sense to expect him to change and start a serious relationship with you. If you are not satisfied with the status of a friend and you want to maintain your self-respect, then it is better to break off communication with this person.

This does not mean that you need to give up friendship completely, just move away a little and give him freedom of choice. Perhaps when communication becomes less intense, you will realize that your romantic feelings for a friend are not so strong either. Or vice versa, he will suddenly see in you not only a friend, but will also begin to miss you as a girl.

In any case, self-respect is something that cannot be lost even for the sake of a relationship.