What if you don't feel better after visiting a psychologist? Does this mean that one can be disappointed in psychology as a science, or is it enough to change a specialist? We deal with the psychologist Ekaterina Alskaya.

How to understand that a psychologist will only harm you: 7 things that cannot be ignored

Finding “your” psychologist can be a daunting task. Specialists work in different therapeutic approaches and hold views on life that may not coincide with yours.


If you visit a psychologist, but do not see progress or feel uncomfortable, you should consider changing it. By what signs you can understand that a psychologist is not suitable for you, I will tell below.


1. Lack of understanding and trust

The relationship between a psychologist and his patient is key to successful therapy. If it is difficult for you to find a common language with  a psychologist , it seems that he does not understand, does not empathize with your problems, this is a wake-up call. You must trust your therapist and feel comfortable and at ease with him.


2. Lack of experience in solving specific problems

Experience matters when it comes to therapy. If your psychologist is new to the field or has no experience with the specific problems you face, he may not be the right fit for you. A therapist with experience and knowledge in the problem area will be better prepared for effective treatment. 2-3 years of experience is enough to successfully deal with the request.


Pay attention to how the specialist is positioned. There are psychologists of a wide profile, perhaps they did not have the experience of handling exactly your request. And others declare themselves in a certain topic, for example, a specialist in working with child-parent relationships.


3. Lack of progress

If you've been seeing a psychologist for weeks or months and don't see any progress in your mental health, it's worth considering finding another specialist. Therapy can take a long time (depending on the situation), but at the initial stage it is necessary to see positive changes and feel that you are moving forward.

4. Inappropriate counseling style

Psychologists use a variety of approaches and techniques in their therapy. You should not feel discomfort from the words or actions of a psychologist. You can look on the Internet, what are the approaches to therapy, what psychologists write about the effectiveness of solving your specific problems.

It is important to feel that therapy is meeting your needs, that you are making progress. If every time you leave a session depressed, it’s a reason to think. However, if there is a deep trauma or a sad insight, it is absolutely normal to leave a meeting immersed in reflection.

Another thing is when it has a permanent effect, a feeling of guilt or shame is also connected . In this case, it is worth discussing with a specialist your concerns and thoughts about what is happening and decide for yourself what to do next.

5. Lack of personal therapy and supervision

Universal questions for any specialist: how many hours of personal therapy he has, whether he undergoes supervision. Having a degree in psychology is not enough to be a psychologist. Without working through oneself, it is impossible to be neutral and listen to the client without projections.

6. Violation of personal boundaries

Postponement of meeting times, frequent lateness, violation of your personal boundaries by a psychologist - if there is one, such an alliance is not therapeutic, it is unlikely that such a specialist will help you.

7. Clash of personal beliefs

Although the therapist should not impose his personal beliefs on patients, it is important to feel that you have common ground with him. If you notice that your beliefs or values ​​conflict with the psychologist's perspective, it will be difficult for you to establish a strong therapeutic alliance.

For example, if you are a religious person, you may need a psychologist who is open to integrating your belief into therapy.

Finding the right psychologist can take some time, you may not be able to find the right specialist the first time. However, it is important that your mental health should be a priority. Trust your instincts and don't be afraid to seek out a psychologist to help you achieve mental well-being .