Go to the store for some bread with arrows and false eyelashes? You have every right to do so. But it also happens that the situation gets out of control. What to do in this case - we figured out together with the expert.

"I can't leave the house without makeup": when it becomes a problem

Relentless statistics

We are constantly writing that makeup should be something fun and light-hearted... Do you want a modest nude look? No problem. Planning to cover your face with a highlighter to shine brighter than the stars? Perfectly! Blue shadows , red arrows and eyelashes "like a spider's legs"  - all this is possible and necessary as long as the process and result give you pleasure. 

But, unfortunately, this is not the case for everyone. According to Superdrug, every third woman wears makeup on her face every time she leaves the house... Even if it is something simple and everyday: at best - go to the store (because here, albeit conditional, but still going out), at worst - take out the trash. 

Some more scary statistics? You are welcome. The same study found that on average women in relationships wait two months before revealing their face without makeup to their partner... And one in ten respondents admits that they would not allow their man to see himself without makeup at all. 

Gloss, society and us

Even if you yourself, your girlfriends and relatives have never encountered anything like this, this does not mean that there is no problem. In fact, there are more women who cannot leave the house without makeup because they think they are unattractive than you can imagine.

There are two abstract reasons for this (at least the main ones):

  • despite the movement towards love for bodies of any type and size, we continue to focus on the once imposed on usideal glossy standards;
  • people in general tend to exaggerate the importance of how important they (their appearance, behavior, awkward situations) play a role in the lives of others - in psychology this is called "Spotlight effect".

But be that as it may, the story with the desire to "make up for sure" may or may not be a problem. How do you know when a situation is out of control?

How to see the problem: advice from a psychologist

“Essentially, face painting is our protection. It refers us to the ancient tribes who painted themselves before going to war. And even if we say that we apply tone, mascara, shadows, lipstick for beauty, we are still so protected from prying eyes, from people who may consider us ugly. And that's okay. But there are women who, without makeup, not only cannot take a step, but for many years they wake up before their husbands to meet their spouse fully armed. And in the same way, they cannot afford to fall asleep before their husband, because all this splendor must be washed off. This situation is an example of pathology. If a woman has a need to always wear makeup, regardless of the circumstances, as in the case of her husband or, say, weeding the beds in the country in full dress, this is a problem,

But at the first stage, if the situation does not seem too serious to you and you feel strong, you can try to become your own psychologist.

“My favorite exercise is deploying answers to questions through 'what?' That is, when I go out on the street unpainted, people will see me. So what? Well, they'll think I'm ugly. So what? Some strangers will appreciate you purely subjectively, and you may not even notice it. What's the big deal? So it will be possible to come to the root - the problem with self-esteem, with self-worth, with something else, ”advises Marina Fokina. 

A few words about the help of a psychologist in such a situation. Do not be afraid that he will look at you strangely or say something like: "People come here with something more serious." The request can be anything. The specialist's task is to work with him. Another thing is thatmakeup is most likely a symptom a more serious and deeper problem, which already needs to be solved.