If you do not want to bring your man to stress, and the relationship to a breakup, try not to tell your partner some phrases. We have compiled a list of "stop words" with a family psychologist.
Discussing relationships is normal and correct practice. But some of our female words, instead of morally preparing for the discussion, make men tense up.
1. We need to talk
Men hate hearing the words : "We need to talk." Because in this phrase, in fact, there are no "you", and, as a rule, only a woman needs to talk. The word "conversation" is also misused. When a girl or wife says, "We need to talk," she is actually saying, "You need to listen to me, and what I have to say is likely to displease you." Of course, these three words are not always saturated with ominous connotations.
The reason so many counselors, relationship experts, and pseudo therapists always say that communication is the key to a strong relationship part of a relationship is because it is true. In a vacuum of silence, healthy relationships don't exist, no matter how comforting the concept may seem to a guy. However choose a more honest invitation to this conversation, or just wait for a convenient moment when you don't need a preface.
2. I don't talk to you
This is the other extreme, which also does not contribute to the harmonization of relations at all. A man doesn't have to guess what he offended you with this time. Problems in a couple should be solved by an objective dialogue in which both parties speak out and try to find a compromise. Silence in such cases is stupid manipulation and psychological pressure that no man will like.
Relationships are defined by boundaries, and the only way to delineate, erase and redraw those boundaries is by talking. If we're not talking about telepaths in love, it's important that the two can find the right words to reveal their grievances, fears, hopes and fantasies.
3. Who called you?
A jealous companion is any man's nightmare. Even if he is completely confident in his loyalty and bright thoughts, such phrases are an attempt on his personal freedom.Many women think that the concept of "personal boundaries" should not figure in relationships, but men for the most part do not agree with this and even believe that it is contrary to their nature. Even if you are ready to give him your phone at any time and answer for every SMS, for him your outbursts of jealousy and control are almost a signal to run away.
4. Spend more time with me
Of course, we are not talking about cases when a man literally disappears at work for days and does not pay any attention to his companion. But trying to completely take over all of your man's free time is fundamentally wrong. Each member of the stronger sex needs personal space - it is important to respect this need.
Try to learn to feel when your partner needs to be alone, when to give him a break and not meddle in his affairs and thoughts. Without this, you and your significant other will simply annoy each other, and over time, the relationship can crack.
5. My ex never did this
Any comparisons with ex-men that are not in his favor will be perceived as hostile by your partner. Neither men nor women are willing to accept such comparisons. The fairest answer to such a remark would be: "Then return to him." Instead of criticizing him, let alone comparing him to others, tell him that you will be very grateful if he does what you think is right.The more you show your appreciation, the more motivated he is to change for you.
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